Could've Been Worse

“Looks like you forgot to pack your goat feet today.”

-Eddy Ellis, everyday at practice for three years

Shit happens.

Last week I was backpacking in Central Oregon, trying to get away from work, cell service, people in general, and the impending doom of a record heatwave hitting most of the Pacific Northwest.

My partner and I planned for three nights in the woods with Remmy, taking our time over about 25 miles with plenty of time to stop for photos. The only tough elevation gain would be the first day but we’d be fresh, we’d get it out of the way, and we’d get some great views along the way.

Here’s the thing… neither one of us slept well and the sun at 6,000 feet, though not as hot as in the city, was so intense that we were nearing exhaustion about seven miles in.

And then, I fell.

We started heading down a steep section of the trail and we were taking it slow and trying to carefully pick our way to the last uphill section of the day. I put my right foot on what I thought was a solid piece of the trail but as I shifted my weight to that leg, my foot slipped. My right leg continued to slide down the hill causing my left knee to slam into a sharp rock.

I’ll spare you the pictures and real gory details but, suffice it to say, my knee was split open pretty bad. I sat down on the trail, my back against the hill I just slid down, and watched blood trickle down my shin.

My partner, having been through several crises with parents and family members, immediately put pressure on it and calmly tried to figure out a more sustainable way to stop the bleeding.

She found some gauze and rigged a tourniquet and the bleeding stopped.

Now the conversation turned to what do we do next?

Having seen the cut and knowing how bad it was bleeding, I knew the right answer.

But my pride wanted me to tape it up, grab some Advil, slug some water, and walk back to the trailhead.

Then I tried to shift my weight by bending my knee a little and the cut started bleeding.

Yeah, I said, call 911.

Search and Rescue showed up a couple hours later, my partner making sure I wasn’t going into shock and keeping Remmy calm all the while. She’s pretty good in an emergency (the SAR guys all said so when they showed up).

They loaded me onto the helicopter and flew me to the hospital while my partner and Remmy hiked back with the rest of the SAR crew.

Luckily, I got a few bangers before they took me away— although I wish they would’ve let me take my camera on the helicopter because we took off right as the sun was setting.

In the end, I had a minuscule tear in one of my tendons but was otherwise fine. Eleven stitches and some pain killers later, I was released and we headed back home. The most damage done was to my pride. It was the first hike of the season, I underestimated the trail, and overestimated my abilities. I also feel bad for Remmy and my partner who didn’t get to have a fun weekend and had to hike out in the dark after being completely exhausted from the walk in.

Everything will heal and I’ll be back on the trail soon enough.

Keep your feet moving

Week Three: Busy, Busy, Busy

It’s been a week.

It hasn’t been a week of bad stress, anxiety, or a generally terrible week.

But it’s been a week nonetheless.

Last week I hinted that there was potential for good news and that potential came to fruition.

While I was still living in DC I was fortunate enough to participate in the Armed Services Arts Partnership’s Comedy Boot Camp which gave me the kick in the ass I needed to try stand-up comedy.

I loved every second of it.

To be funny is one thing; to be funny on purpose is a completely different cricket match.

It wasn’t just the new skill I was learning or the response I received from some of my jokes, it was the community ASAP had built.

That community was one of the most supportive I’ve been a part of.

This week marked one year since I got on stage at the DC Improv and made a room full of people laugh. Now, I’ve never tried cocaine but if it’s anything like getting an applause break from a joke, I understand its appeal.

Anyway, my graduation show was the last for the founder and then-head of ASAP, Sam Pressler. Apparently building and running a successful non-profit can really take a lot out of you and at some point you just need a long vacation.

With his vacation finished, Sam apparently got restless and decided he wanted to start a podcast. You know, the thing sane people like to do.

Long story short, I’m the new Communications Director for the In Stitches podcast.

It wasn’t so much that it’s a podcast or that Sam is a cool guy— I mean, he has a flip phone so how cool could he be— it was the idea of the podcast: finding the connection between humor and coping/dealing with life.

Essentially, the podcast is about finding the common humanity in humor.

I’ve always said some people collect stamps, some collect coins, I collect stories.

The funny stories are my favorite.

So if you like stories and you like funny people and you have forty-ish minutes every couple of weeks, give the podcast a listen and follow it on Instagram, Twitter, and/or Facebook— even if you don’t like any of those things, you should follow it so I can brag to everyone involved in the podcast once it gets popular.

On top of the podcast, I got a new camera and I absolutely love it.

For the past six years I’ve been using a Canon Rebel T3 and, while it was reliable and worked well, it was time for an upgrade. I bought a Canon 7D Mark II which is like going from a Camry to a Camaro. It just has so much more depth and character to it.

In terms of photos, I kind of became addicted to flat lay shots. There’s just so much you can do and such a great story you can tell with a handful of images and a simple set up. This style really combines well with my storytelling style brain.

So buckle in, because there are about to be a lot of flat lay photos on your collective social medias (as we speak I’m planning about ten different ideas for the coming weeks).

All this on top of wrestling trees into wood chippers— I’m not bragging; just helping to explain the title.

Finally, with no context or explanation, take Bob Barker’s advice and get your pet spayed or neutered and don’t wait too long to do so….

Keep Your Feet Moving

Frames this Week: 1, 179

Total Frames: 2, 430

Day 15- May 10

While I was searching for props for the previous day’s shots, I noticed an old, heavy sewing machine amongst a bunch of boxes. Naturally, I decided it would be fun a flat lay for something old and, most likely, not in production anymore.

My mother is a big quilting fan so I borrowed a bunch of her stuff and played around with a few different shots.

It really is like a puzzle that only you can see and solve.

Filling spots that look empty with something, deciding that doesn’t work there and moving it but then having to replace it with something else, etc. It’s structure and flow out of chaos and ambiguity.

It didn’t turn out quite the way I wanted but I wasn’t really sure how to fix it and fill in the gaps I thought I saw.

Eventually I’ll get it down and understand just how to make everything flow just a little bit better.

Day 16- May 11

Surprise! Another flat lay.

I really like the brand of beard care products (wow, that sounds really douchey) I buy and thought it might be fun to throw in all the stuff I have for my beard hygiene (that sounds worse).

I decided to go simpler on this shot because I felt the sewing machine was a little too busy and there were too many small things getting lost in the shot.

It might have been a bit of an overcorrection but overall I was happy with the way this shot turned out.

I’m also going to be a brand ambassador for them so be prepared for more flat lays with their products.

Day 17- May 12

This day was all about Remmy.

Her new collar and leash from Pack Leashes came in and, since she’s now a brand ambassador (GOAT20 for 20% off) for them, figured I should probably hold up her end of the bargain and actually get some shots in her new swag.

Two things: she doesn’t like sitting still and she’s faster than most Auto Focus servos I have. Might have to get a different lens for doing shoots with her.

Or she could just sit still for like two seconds… that would be nice.

She’s cute though.

Day 18- May 13

I’m a big fan of bourbon and a big fan of Larceny in particular. One of my previous shots captured at Heaven Hill’s Distillery (where Larceny is made and bottled) was taken in one of their rick houses after the tour group I was with had been locked in. I was personally not too upset to be locked in with tens of thousands of barrels of bourbon but apparently it was a “safety concern”.

Anyway, I played around with the theme already on the bottle with some old looking keys and a glass of the good stuff.

I’d like to say the background I used was from an actual barrel of bourbon that had been cut up but alas, it was simply a cutting board with a cool looking wood grain.

Since it’s a prop, the bottle should be tax deductible… right?

Day 19- May 14

The day I got my new camera.

I didn’t really know what to shoot and I spent a lot of time playing around with the mechanisms and settings on my new camera.

Then I thought, I might as well show people what I’ve been working with for the past half-decade.

The T3 will still be my climbing camera for sweet arborist and rock climbing shots but the majority of my remaining photos will be taken with the 7D.

Day 20- May 15

The governor decided to have a restricted reopening on Friday and I got off work early which meant it was time to go for a drive.

Due to the reopening, Barn Door Brewing was open and serving pints. It had been way too long since I ordered and enjoyed a pint (or two) at a brewery I've never been to.

It was so refreshing albeit a little anxiety-inducing.

In the back of the brewery there was an old International flat bed that had been converted to a smoker or small, mobile kitchen of some sort.

It looked like it was in great shape and still runs so I figured why not capture what made it such a beautiful work horse in the first place.

Day 21- May 16

This was honestly my best day of shooting.

Early in the week I thought about what I could shoot in the flat lay style and it hit me (after way too much time), why not take pictures of the gear and equipment I’m around everyday.

I went into work ON MY DAY OFF and spent at least an hour playing with different set ups of chain saws, climbing gear, ropes, different tools, and all the things arborists and tree services use on a day-to-day basis.

My goal for the shoot was to get a shot that my boss would want to hang at his house or in the shop. Something subtle and simple but representative of his passion and career.

He loved two of the shots I sent him.

Challenge complete.

Week Two: Creative Boredom

Creatively, it was a bit of a tough week.

The days are getting longer and warmer which means the light is a little bit harsher for a little bit longer. That’s normally not a huge issue as I can either focus on smaller, less light-intensive subjects or go inside and figure out my relatively new flash.

This week, I ran into a wall.

Wrestling tree limbs is always physically demanding but when the weather gets better and the temperature starts rising, it plays a little different on your system.

For me, my dumb ass is terrible at remembering to drink water and I’d often get home and feel like laying on the floor until it was time to go to work the next day. To put it mildly, my energy was a bit low this week.

Normally when my energy is low, there’s two types of shots that are generally pretty easy and are crowd-pleasers: macros of flowers and portraits of Remmy.

Here’s the thing, the whole point of me shooting everyday is to push myself and try to improve my craft. “Easy” should make me want to turn my nose in disgust— which it did a couple times— and I was tired of taking macros of flowers.

In a sense, I was creatively bored with some of the shots I was taking. There wasn’t a whole lot of inspiration or out-of-the-box thinking that accompanied the shots I had time and energy to take.

Most days I was able to drag my ass somewhere and try something different or find a new location but there were a couple days where I phoned it in, hated every shot I took, and then bitched about it to a few of my friends.

On the flip side, I had a few high-energy days where I drove around for two hours looking for the “perfect” shot only to come up short or get a shot I felt was subpar. Essentially it was a week filled with frustration and a little self-doubt.

Obviously, I’m still pushing on and continuing to shoot everyday— you don’t get better without working through the shitty days. It’s also part of the point in this entire project: proving to myself I CAN take decent photos everyday if I just get off my ass and do it.

Still, there are days when my mind wanders and looks for the easy route, the one that takes less time and meets the minimum requirements. I have to tell myself that it’s okay not be “on” everyday and sometimes I just need to do it, get it done, and move on.

I almost never believe myself and don’t particularly love the shots I take on those days but, in time, I’ll be a little easier on myself.

In other but related news, I ordered a new camera. I’ve had my current camera for almost six years and it’s been great and I’ll continue to use it for certain things but I figured it’s time to upgrade if I’m going to take this seriously.

It gets here Thursday and I can’t wait to try it out.

There may also be some good news in the next couple of weeks so things are looking up.

The boredom I’ve been experiencing this week just reminds me that I need to push myself and continue to grow.

Really it’s the only thing any of us can do if we want to keep our sanity.

Keep Your Feet Moving

Frames This Week: 676

Total Frames: 1,251

Day 8- May 3

It was my Dad’s birthday and instead of kicking back and relaxing, he helped the neighbors build a fence… you know, like normal people do.

It rained off and on all weekend but it poured particularly hard on Sunday. I was still chasing the elusive raindrop shot but also wanted to capture the essence of my Dad. The shot I ended up getting did one and a half of those things.

I managed to capture him working outside— something he always did when I was a kid— and almost got a raindrop or two. You can at least tell it’s raining and there’s a few drops in the background.

My Dad turned 63 but he still works like he’s 23.

Day 9- May 4

This was the day my boredom started.

I took Remmy on a longer walk, hoping I could find something to shoot, something interesting and out of the norm. Maybe some horses on the border of a suburban area or a tractor plowing a field or something that I didn’t normally see when I pulled out my camera.

Unfortunately, I didn’t find what I was looking for.

The horses were in some trees where I couldn’t get a good angle, the farmers were too far away to see or not out, and the rain was back.

So, it was flowers.

I tried to get some flowers with bees on them but every time a bee came near the flowers, Remmy would try to eat them and they’d fly away.

Spring is nice in that there are so many flowers in bloom right now, it’s difficult not to find one that could be potentially interesting for a macro shot.

But they’re relatively easy to shoot and there’s only so many angles on a Cala Lilly and all of them look phallic in some way so I wasn’t the most enthusiastic about these shots.

Day 10- May 5

Since the weather was nice and there was decent cloud cover (65%, which is far better than 17%) I figured I might as well find a good sunset shot.

There’s a pond not far from me that— I thought— wouldn’t be crowded with people and I could get a decent shot without worrying about being around people.

I thought wrong.

I expected an empty or near-empty parking lot but as I pulled up, it was clear people weren’t taking the stay-at-home order seriously. Not that I had any room to judge.

Remmy isn’t a huge fan of loud people either so we walked around the pond a bit and found a nice spot to settle it. She got a little curious when a beaver (I think) slipped into the pond and swan to the other side. Had my camera not already been mounted on the tripod, I would’ve snapped a couple photos but alas it’s an image only for me.

Day 11- May 6

I managed to bang out a lot of frames on this particular day.

After work I went for a drive around the some of the farm communities and snapped a few shots of some clover fields and a trio of horses. They weren’t my favorite shots in the world— the horses were too close to a house and I couldn’t get close enough to keep the fence out of the frame— but I found a few other potential spots for sunsets or sunrises in the future so I figured it was a success.

Having finished, I drove back to town to run an errand and on the way back, the main street in front of me had been closed down by local police and fire departments.

A kitchen fire on the second floor of the newest apartment complex drew fire crews from three different stations and closed down the main strip for three blocks.

Obviously, I grabbed my camera and started shooting.

I was able to grab a few action shots of firefighters grabbing equipment from their trucks or popping out on the apartment’s balcony to direct the other crews.

Unfortunately, the sun was still high and very harsh so many of the shots were high in contrast and made some of the plants and trees look fake. I tried to get a shot of a concerned-looking Corgi but he kept moving his head anytime I’d click the shutter… he’s still a good boi.

Day 12- May 7

This was, by far, my most frustrating day.

As I was driving back from that day’s job (it was my turn to drive the stump grinder to the shop) I saw Mt. Hood in my rear view mirror. It’s been a while since I tried to get a shot of the mountain and longer since I’d seen it that clear.

After I dropped off the trailer and tested out my new harness in the cedar behind the shop, I drove around looking for a good spot… for two fucking hours.

I noticed a gravel road with a couple farms from one of the back roads I was on and pulled onto it. I noticed some bee hives in the corner and thought I could take some shots of that after I’d gotten the one I stopped for in the first place.

I fired a few frames of Hood with clover in the foreground and played around with different looks. After I was satisfied with those, I took a few of the hives themselves and then returned my attention to the mountain just in case I didn’t get the shot I wanted— which I’m glad I did.

When I uploaded everything to my computer it looked like my lens had ALL the dust spots on it based on the shots I was looking at. I grabbed my camera and looked at my lens filter. There were a few small spots here and there but there wasn’t anything that would warrant my photos looking the way they did.

Then I remembered: the bees.

Every shot saw bees streaking across the frame in the sky line and almost ruining the shot. There were too many bees not to notice and not enough to make it look like I’d shot them on purpose to show their movement so I spent probably forty-five minutes in Lightroom getting rid of all the streaks.

They didn’t turn out too bad and I managed to get some good shots of the hives themselves. Despite my frustrations I managed to get some good frames and work with what I had. I might go back to that spot and try to show just how much the bees move.

Day 13- May 8

I forgot to drink water the day before and woke up with a headache and almost no energy.

Work was a bit of a drag only because it was too hot by 9AM, I still didn’t feel like myself, and I knew I would have very little energy for photos later in the day.

Once I got home I tried to fight through the lack of energy, do something simple but meaningful and failed in every shot.

I tried taking some photos of some older looking books but, after looking at them on the computer, was unimpressed.

I laid on the floor in the exact spot the AC hits you from all directions and thought. At some point my hat fell off and I noticed the sweat lines and dirt on the brim.

I grabbed my camera and fired off a few macros, trying to get the contrasting colors of the fabric untouched by sweat and the grungy, dirty fabric that had.

In some ways, the shot was an homage to everyone who knows the feeling of breaking in a new hat and knowing that it takes several months of sweat and dirt to get it just right.

I definitely half-assed the planning of this shot though considering how little energy I had and how few fucks I gave, it turned out to be a pretty decent shot.

Day 14- May 9

Determined not to have another day of uninspired shooting, I woke a little earlier than I thought (thanks, Remmy) and sipped on my coffee while I scrolled through Instagram and Twitter.

Finding nothing there, I perused some photography videos on YouTube and figured out the day’s shoot: flat lay photography.

Typically used for product and commercial shots, I figured I had enough stuff around to make a decent flat lay.

I looked at my work boots and noticed all the scuffs and oil/gas stains on the toe and built my idea around the idea of well-used but reliable tools and equipment.

It could just be a stereotype but when I think of blue collar workers I think of cigarettes and smoking so I decided to get a pack of smokes and a lighter. But to take it a step further to capture the “old-timey” feel of the shot I got a soft pack of cigarettes and a Zippo lighter. In some ways it turned into a 1980’s blue collar worker shot.

I found the one place with a plain Zippo lighter (Walmart) and bought it and the cigarettes.

But the lighter looked too new— I know, weird, right?

So I did what any normal and sane person would do: I beat the shit out of it until it looked like it had been at least a little worn in.

The shot was a lot more time-consuming than I thought. It was like getting a 1,000 piece puzzle while thinking, “I’m an adult, I should be able to do this in no-time” which always costs four days worth of free time, a perfectly good friendship, and a very large portion of your sanity.

That said, it was one of the most fun shoots I’ve done since starting this project. Every little detail mattered and could dramatically change the feeling of the shot. Whether it was the angle of the pack of cigarettes or whether the lighter was opened or closed, the story the photo told somehow changed— and yes I’m well aware I should’ve wrinkled the cigarette pack a little.

Going through the raw shots after I’d gotten done was a lot of fun and I’ll definitely be doing a lot more of these types of shots going forward.

Challenges

I'm not sure when or why but I felt I was creatively lacking a few weeks ago.

My writing felt flat, my photos were few and far between, and the prospect of writing new jokes was overwhelming and burdensome.

I came up with a lot of ideas, articles and stories I should write, interesting photos to shoot, a few premises with legs. But the ideas just went into my notebook or in my phone and I left them there to marinate, hoping they'd somehow produce themselves.

It was a full-blown creative rut.

I made the age-old excuses: "I'm busy with my full-time job", "I just don't have the energy", "if it were actually a good idea, I'd be throwing myself into it", and, the classic, "I'll do it later".

I don't think there's a writer/photographer/ comic/ creative in the world that hasn't gone through this-- at least that's what I tell myself to keep from spiraling too much-- but the good ones, the ones that keep going and actually make careers out of their art forms, are the ones that recognize they're in a rut and try to do something about it.

So, about a week ago, I was sitting on the couch, watching a cooking show or a climbing documentary or something, and decided to challenge myself.

I decided to produce at least one photo everyday.

It won't necessarily fix everything, my writing may still be flat and my jokes may still land like the Hindenburg, but at least I'll be putting myself into a creative headspace everyday.

I can't remember which writer's memoir I read-- could've been Stephen King or Mark Twain or any of the other random authors-- but in it they said the key to inspiration and creativity is the routine of placing yourself into that creative mindset. Inspiration and creativity is essentially a muscle that needs to be exercised every day in order to get better and build more creativity and inspiration.

In a way, I'm challenging myself and this idea that the more often you're creative, the more likely you are to be inspired.

Over the seven days, I fired off 575 frames and produced at least seven decent photos. They weren't all, as Peter McKinnon calls them, "bangers" but I worked through the lack of energy, time, or inspiration.

If nothing else, the daily challenge will give me something to write about. Whether it's my frustrations with the process or the pride when I find a shot and nail it.

To keep myself accountable, I'm posting the pictures on Twitter everyday (you can follow along here) and trying to post daily on Instagram.

This will be another platform with which I can keep myself accountable.

So enjoy the photos but call me on my bullshit when I half-ass a photo or complain about being too busy. We're all too busy but we all should prioritize the things that bring us happiness and peace.

Keep Your Feet Moving

Frames This Week: 575

Total Frames: 575

Day 1- April 26

I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to shoot, didn’t even have the slightest idea of what types of photos I wanted to get.

But it was a nice day and Remmy always likes going on walks so I grabbed her leash, a roll of poop bags, and my camera.

Oregon didn’t have a particularly harsh winter so some of the flowers started to bloom early and a lot of them have been in full bloom for the better part of a month.

Remmy and I walked around the neighborhood and I shot some of the prettier flowers while she sniffed everything in a six foot radius. We found a small grassy area with a giant oak tree. Remmy managed to sit still long enough for me to snap a few frames.

On the way home I found a batch of white tulips and picked one and put it in Remmy’s collar. She tolerated my shenanigans for a little bit and then we played fetch.

One of the last shots I took was her taking a break and giving her best puppy smile.

The portraits of her landed her a job as a brand ambassador for Pack Leashes so if you’re in the market for a new leash or collar you can use GOAT20 to get 20% off on their site.

All in all, it wasn’t a bad first day.

But first days are rarely that bad.

Day 2- April 27

Monday was a rough day.

Next to Tuesdays, Mondays are the worst day of the week.

After wrestling tree limbs for eight hours, my energy level was pretty close to zero. All I wanted to do was enjoy a bourbon or two, eat dinner, and just relax.

I knew if I didn’t grab my camera before I ate, I wouldn’t end up shooting anything, I looked for something small around the house.

The tulip I’d used in Remmy’s collar the day before was on the counter in a glass of water.

A friend of mine, and fellow photographer, told me about wanting to take better macros and how he did his best without a proper flash. Having just gotten a new flash, I decided to test it out.

It was fun trying to find the best angle with the right settings on the flash and really bringing out the detail of the now-dying flower. The lack of energy I’d felt before I started shooting went away as soon as that first frame was fired off.

That may have been the most important day of the week. It would’ve been easy to just say “fuck it” and not taken any photos. I mean, it was only the second day and I hadn’t really invested anything into the project and only a handful of people knew what I was trying to do.

But I pushed through and got what I think are some pretty great shots.

Day 3- April 28

This was probably the easiest day of the week. I realized a while ago that if I didn’t bring my camera to work, there would inevitably be a shot that I wished I could’ve gotten with my actual camera rather than settling for my phone.

We were doing a drop and leave of some very large and very dead Poplars on a guy’s property meaning we were just cutting them down and leaving the remains for the home owner to deal with.

Near the end of the day, after three of the four or five trees had been felled, I grabbed my camera and started shooting.

As I was shooting, my boss cut a limb that slipped and started to fall out of his reach. Somehow, he managed to grab the limb before it crashed into the roof— which was the point of our removing the trees in the first place.

The only thing I don’t like about the shot is that you can only sort of see the climber in the shot but that’s kind of the price you pay for getting shots of really, really, ridiculously tall trees.

Day 4- April 29

At this point I was feeling pretty good with the shots I’d gotten so I decided to add an extra layer of creativity.

After taking a handful of shots of my post-work bourbon and not being completely satisfied— although they turned out better than I thought— I borrowed some Disney stuffed animals and tried to take a series that I found hilarious (though my niece would probably cry if she saw them.

I’m not a fan of Frozen.

So I made a scene where Mickey was annoyed with the Frozen franchise and decided to contract Goofy and Mater to take out one of the most popular characters from said franchise.

The lighting and the backdrop definitely need some work but I was working with what I had at the time. The resulting photos aren’t exactly what I envisioned and are no where near perfect but the objective of a funny series was mostly realized.

And before you ask, there is a lot wrong with my sense of humor and yes I’m okay with it.

Day 5- April 30

One of the cool things about wrestling trees is getting to see so many different parts of the area that I’m unfamiliar with or haven’t really taken the time to look at.

On the way back from a job a couple months ago I noticed a barn along the side of a north-south road. I’m a sucker for trying to get good sunset photos and an even bigger sucker for older, somewhat worn down barns. This barn seemed to satisfy both of my vices.

I was a bit upset to have to do this particular shot on a weeknight when I had to be up for work the next day, especially since the days are getting longer and the sunset is getting even later but it was one of the last evenings for the week that was supposed to be clear.

In December I drove three hours to a light house to try to get a sunset shot there but there was too much cloud cover and I couldn’t see more than a few hundred meters in front of me and there wouldn’t be much of a sunset. The forecast for that day was at 85%.

On this particular day, the forecast called for 17% or basically one cloud.

Most good sunset photos have a decent set of clouds in them and those clouds are often why you get the deep red and orange sunsets that make you want to grab an expensive bottle of wine and just sit.

This was not one of those sunsets.

So I learned that 85% cloud cover is too much and 17% is not nearly enough. Like Goldielocks I’m still searching for the cover that’s “juuuuust right”.

Day 6- May 1

This was a bit of a tough day in terms of having time to get good shots. Most of the day, I’d been going over my set for a virtual comedy show and hadn’t really let myself think about what sort of shots I wanted to get.

After stressing out about my set and then doing the show, I was emotionally pretty wiped.

So I tried to give a bit of an inside glimpse into the mind of a comedian by showing my set list and my “anti-anxiety medication”.

It was a good set and I had a lot of fun doing it.

Day 7- May 2

I don’t remember the photographer but they were really good at showing rain and snowfall in their photos and since it rained most of the day, I attempted to capture rain as it fell.

During the one snowfall this winter, I tried to capture the flakes in a cityscape but was mostly unsuccessful. A different photographer friend suggested using a flash— after I had already started editing and the snow had stopped.

Not to be thwarted I took my new flash out and tried, once again, to capture the rain.

Most of the shots where individual rain drops were visible didn’t really blow my skirt up in terms of composition and intrigue.

So I focused on drops that had already fallen which gave a nice contrast in feel to the flower photos I’d taken earlier in the week.

Moving... Without Moving

There’s a huge appeal to working for yourself and trying to make your own money, there’s a risk that makes it seem romantic in a lot of ways. Add to that the seductive nature of the road and traveling and you have yourself a Steinbeck or Kerouac novel on your hands.

What’s often forgotten— or in my case completely ignored because of hubris— is how hard it is to actually make money as a freelancer. Emailing pitches, writing articles and trying to get them published, practically begging people to buy your photos (or t-shirts, of which there are still plenty left), and just trying to get your name out there as a quality writer and photographer.

From August to November, I was living almost carefree, driving everywhere, interviewing people, writing stories on events, taking photos in national parks, participating in veteran-oriented programs to later write a story, and generally feeling like I could and would do that forever.

But then, the stories didn’t get published, the photos took longer to sell, and gas money started to run low.

I’m not complaining; I know that’s how the business works and that it takes a while to get established and editors are always leery of new writers with a relatively unproven record. Hell, if I were in their shoes, I’d send most pitches to the spam folder.

I guess, my hubris got the better of me. “I can make a living doing this, look at how great of a writer I am, look at the photos I take, look at the life I’m living. Everyone should want to read the stories I write.”

It’s been a humbling experience to be sure.

For now, I’m working part-time gigs cleaning stalls at a horse ranch, throwing trees into a chipper, and any other work I can find. I’m extremely appreciative of everyone who’s given me the opportunity to work for them.

In some ways, it’s been a blessing. I’ve had the opportunity to research new ways to continue doing what I love while making money at the same time, I’ve been able to spend more time with my niece and nephew, and I’ve been able to work with some truly generous people. Plus there’s something therapeutic about working outside and smelling like horse piss at the end of the day.

Recently, I’ve started reaching out to local business to see if they are in need of new photos for their website, offices, or dining areas, offered to help a couple people set up Instagram accounts to help grow their business a little and gain credibility within the community, and have essentially tried to start building a local reputation so I can expand as I get more established.

It’s definitely not going the way I planned—although when has life ever gone the way any of us planned— but I am still happy with my decision to break away from the normal 9-5 cubicle/desk jobs and do what I love for a living.

So even though I’m at somewhat of a stand still, I’m making the best of the situation and still chasing my dream and trying to make it work the best I can.

In the words of Jimmy Dugan from A League of Their Own, “it’s supposed to be hard. The hard is what makes it great.”

Don’t worry about me, I’ll figure it out.

Keep Your Feet Moving

As an aside, if you’re in the Oregon or Washington areas and are in need of some photos, feel free to shoot me a message.